He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
