Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
