I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
