You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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