Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
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