I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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