there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Dicks are not precious.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
