Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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