Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
