We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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