these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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