Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
