It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
now i know why i became what i already was.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Randomize
