True but thats because hes a fetus.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
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