Well douche your snatch and let's go!
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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