the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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