I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
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