It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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