apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
