so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
