BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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