It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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