are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize