Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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