Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
