Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize