just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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