To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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