hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
