He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize