I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
