should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
