Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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