Ambien. No doubt about it.
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize