I wanna passion pit in your ass
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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