I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
