she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Randomize
