her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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