I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
