weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
