This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
You are the jesus of drinking
Drake has all the answers
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