Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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