They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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