Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Randomize
