let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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