Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
