nut hugger
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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