Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
