I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Randomize
