I think I died a long time ago.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Randomize
