He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I am available for nakedness
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize